Joshua David Collier

You cannot see or touch me
But I'm standing next to you.
Your tears will only hurt me,
Your sadness makes me blue.
Be brave and show a smiling face
Let not your grief show through.
I love you from a different place,
Yet I'm standing next to you.

Rachel Bass. Josh June 8, 2009

Simply Put

Simply put ...I really miss you
I've continued to ask why
Life took this dreadful wrong turn...
Now I often sit and cry
*♥* *♥*
Simply put ...my heart is broken
Most people have no clue
Unless they live this heartache...
They don't know what I've lived through
*♥* *♥*
Simply put... I long to hug you
Share a gentle warm embrace
Often spend each day just wishing....
This truth could somehow be erased
*♥* *♥*
Simply put... I can't remember...
The last time I heard your voice
Memories are often painful...
I was not given any choice
*♥* *♥*
Simply put... I know I'm grieving
Won't get better through the years
I have learned some coping methods...
To accept this new frontier
*♥* *♥*
Simply put... I'm good at masking
Denying what I feel
For I know deep down inside me...
I will never truly heal.
*♥* *♥*
Simply put...I really miss you
No one knows the pain I bear
Simply put... there is no reason
Losing you was just not fair.
*♥* *♥*

Rachel Bass. Josh June 2, 2009

Josh

Hey
15 years ago today, I was holding you in my arms,
you were still with us sweetheart, and now we are coming up to your, 15th annviersary.
I still remember every detail of the day you died son,
I remember seen daddy in the police car giving statements, going to the hospital and not really knowing who to call first,to let them know the news.
And then the nurse came in and told us you were gone.
Which really we knew already, why Josh? Why did you have to go? why did you leave us? dad did all the furneral arrangements as he said it was the lasst thing he could do for you. and then we had this really stupid stupid idea that Our God could bring you back to life, for us and we would see you again, and once more hold you in our arms.
Im feeling so so numb about the whole situation at the moment. I know I had you because it still hurts so so bad that your gone, but its been that long since we last saw you and held you in our arms, It doesnt seam real, that you were ever born.
Yet I still have the scares from your pregnancy and birth. I love you Josh and we hate living this life without you, as time gets nearer, its getting harder yet again. I hate going through this feeling every year, I wished i didnt have to, I either want you back or want to be with you so I dont have to suffer this loss anymore. But I have daddy and jessica and mark to think of now sweetheart, I know your looking over us all. I know your in my heart where no-one get pull you away from me. I'll love and miss you forever and ever until we can be together again.... Mummy x x x x x x x x x x

Michelle Collier (Mummy) May 28, 2009

my baby you will always be

HI SWEETHEART,
mummys been having dreams about you this week, I miss you Josh. You will always be in my heart, sweetheart, NO-ONE, can ever take that away from me. You were my first born son. so so precious to me, I want to talk about you, and sometimes need to talk about you. I so cant wait for the day when we will be re-united as one big family again. Yes you were only with us for a short time, but what a wonderful 69days we had with you. Daddys so clever hes written a song for you and Jordan Jo, so as soon as I can it will be on here for you sweetheart. Oh I also have a suprise for you, Im gonna put some plants on your grave soon sweetheart, and I want daddy to make a cross for you too. Mummy wants to do as much as I can for you this year, especially trying to get some sort of mark on you resting place. I love you Josh and I'll try and come here more often to talk to you son.Missing you always LOVE Mummy xoxoxox
PS sweet Jesus please give my boy a big hug as I know hes in your arms now thankyou.

Michelle Collier (Mummy) April 17, 2009

Easter Eggs

If only our children were easter eggs
Hidden safely in the grass,
We could search for them and pick them up
And hold them in our grasp.

We’d have a heavenly easter egg hunt
All with baskets in our hands,
Searching with a broken heart
Only we could understand.

“Oh look, I found your child here!”
“Hey, did anyone find mine?”
They are so beautifully coloured
How they sparkle and they shine.

These aren’t your usual easter eggs
They each have their own special glow,
That comes from way down deep within
Only a grieving parent would know.

We gather up our special eggs
With excitement all around,
For the gift that we’ve been given
For the treasure we have found.

We all stare with wonderment
At our children that have died,
We want to hold them once again
And release them from inside.

But we all begin to realize
We’d have to crack their beautiful shell,
The one that makes them sparkle and glow
The one they have earned so well.

We can’t destroy their beauty
And take them from their magic place,
So we give them an understanding kiss
As the tears run down our face.

One by one we take our baskets
With our beautifully coloured eggs,
And place them gently in the grass
As we walk away with bowed heads.
We look back in amazement
As our eggs begin to sing,
We see them flutter and move about
“Look – our eggs all now have wings!”

Then the Golden Egg begins to speak
“Your children are safe with me,
You’ll be with them again when the time is right
Together for eternity.”

We stand there in a circle of love
As we look up to the sky,
Watching our radiant eggs take flight
Knowing our children didn’t die.

Rachel Bass. Josh April 9, 2009

.♥ღ♥ Have A Lovely Birthday Baby Angel..♥ღ♥

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----{~*~*~*~*~HAPPY ~* ~*~*~*~}
----{~*~*~*~ BIRTHDAY! ~*~*~*~}
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.♥ღ♥
Your Wondering If I'll Celebrate
My Birthday (Way Up Here)
I Know Your Missing Me Today
I Feel Your Essence Near.
.♥ღ♥
God Planned A Special Day For Me
He Told Me With A Wink
Hhe Ordered Me A Special Cake
(It's Angel Food I Think)
.♥ღ♥
Im Getting Lots Of Hugs From God
He's Realy Good At That
And Every Time That I Walk By
He Gives My Head A Pat
.♥ღ♥
Balloons Will Fill The Streets For Me
They Float Up Through The Clouds
And We Have Lots Of Clowns Up Here
That Make Us Laugh Out Loud
.♥ღ♥
There's A Birthday Carousel
Jeweld Horses Ride The Wind
With Music Playing. Ho So Sweet....
The Magic Never Ends
.♥ღ♥
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
♥ღ♥ Angel babies,
In Heaven above,
In God‘s care,
Wrapped in our love.♥ღ♥
♥ღ♥ Angel babies,
You’ll never know,
Just how much,
We miss you so.♥ღ♥
♥ღ♥ Angel babies,
Spirits set free,
To roam the skies,
For eternity.♥ღ♥
♥ღ♥ Angel babies,
Though we’re apart,
You’ll always remain,
Deep within our hearts.♥ღ♥
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-------*,,,()LOVE(),,,,,*
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.......*’’*. .*’’*
......*..U will..*
.......*..Be....*
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...........’*’
.........*’’*. .*’’*
........*.In my....*
.........*.heart..*
...........*......*
..............’*’
............z Z
.........z Z z
(”)_(”)_.-””-.,
` _ _ `; -._, `)_
( o_, )` __) `-._)

☆ ♥ Goodnight Godbless Joshua ♥ ☆
☆ ♥ Sweetdreams Baby Angel ♥ ☆
☆ ♥ Love Tina (Callum Coulson`s Mammy)♥ ☆

Tina Coulson April 5, 2009

happy birthday

Happy 15th Birthday son,
Hope your having a wonderful party in heaven with all your friends, did you see the cake daddy got for you. Your first one sweetheart, we love you Josh always xxxxxxxx

Michelle Collier (Mummy) April 5, 2009

your birthday soon

Missing you son more and more as your birthday approaches. I wished you were here with us, to celebrate it on earth, but somehow, someway, i know you'll be with us as we celebrate it without you, going to try and make it a special day this year,
will be thinking of you tomorrow as its mothers day, yes I never had one of thoes with you did I.
I love you joshua always, Mummy xxxxx

Michelle Collier (Mummy) March 22, 2009

Dear Mr. Hallmark

I am writing to you from Heaven
And though it must appear
A rather strange idea
I see everything from here.

I just popped in to visit
Your shops to find a card
A card of love for my Mum
As this day for her is hard.

There must be some mistake I thought
Every card you could imagine
Except I could not find a card
From a child who lives in Heaven.

She is still a Mother too
No matter where I reside
I had to leave she understands
But oh the tears she cried.

I thought that if I wrote to you
That you would come to know
That though I live in Heaven now
I still love my Mummy so.

She talks with me and dreams with me
We still share laughter too
Prayers are our way of speaking now
Would you see what you can do?

My Mum carries me in her heart
Her tears she hides from sight
She thinks of me and misses me
Sometimes far into the night.

She plants flowers in her garden
There my memory dwells
She helps other grieving parents
Trying to ease their pain as well.

So you see Mr. Hallmark
Though I no longer live on earth
I must try to find a way
To remind her of her worth.

She needs to be honoured
And remembered too
Just like children on earth
For their Mums today do.

Thank you Mr. Hallmark
I know you’ll do your best
I have done all I can do
To you I’ll leave the rest.

Find a way to tell her
How much she means to me
Until I can do it myself
When we’re joined in Eternity.

Rachel Bass. Josh March 21, 2009

Tribute Is For This Weekend


Candles Might Not Be Lit Until Monday Next Week It's My Birthday On Saturday So I Will Be Missing Christopher Even More Than Usual... Bless Him X


Grief Is Like A River

My grief is like a river,
I have to let it flow,
But I myself determine
Just where the banks will go.

Some days the current takes me
In waves of guilt and pain,
But there are always quiet pools
Where I can rest again.

I crash on rocks of anger;
My faith seems faint indeed,
But there are other swimmers
Who know that what I need

Are loving hands to hold me
When the waters are too swift,
And someone kind to listen
When I just seem to drift.

Grief's river is a process
Of relinquishing the past.
By swimming in hope's channels,
I'll reach the shore at last.



If I Knew


If I knew it would be the last time
That I'd see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
And pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time
That I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
And call you back for one more.

If I knew it would be the last time
I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would video tape each action and word,
So I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time,
I could spare an extra minute
To stop and say "I love you,"
Instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
Well I'm sure you'll have so many more,
So I can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow
To make up for an oversight,
And we always get a second chance
To make everything just right.

There will always be another day
To say "I love you,"
And certainly there's another chance to say
Our "Anything I can do?"

But just in case I might be wrong,
And today is all I get,
I'd like to say how much I love you
And I hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone,
Young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance
You get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow,
Why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes,
You'll surely regret the day,

That you didn't take that extra time
For a smile, a hug, or a kiss
And you were too busy to grant someone,
What turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today,
And whisper in their ear,
Tell them how much you love them
And that you'll always hold them dear

Take time to say "I'm sorry,"
"Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."
And if tomorrow never comes,
You'll have no regrets about today.

Thoughts Today Memories Forever
Angela(Christopher-John Rowe)Mum

Marie-Angela Rowe February 27, 2009