| Location | Stoke On Trent |
| Age | 2 months |
| Cause of Death | Cot Death/Sudden Infant Death Syndrome |
| Date of Birth | 05/04/1994 |
| Date of Death | 13/06/1994 |
| Visitors | 524 since 11/02/2009 |
| Creator |
Joshua David Collier.......
Age 69days, was found asleep on 13th June 1994, sleeping inbetween his mummy and daddy.......
Joshys was a very special baby to me, he was all I ever wanted, and finnally I had him. He was a
hard birth. He sat on my siatic nerve in my right leg for the last 2 weeks before he was born. Made
it impossible for me to walk without pain. I had him at 2:23am on 5th April 1994 by Ventouse
delivery. I knew he was a boy right from the start, and I was persistant that his name would be
Joshua David, he weighed 6lb and was very very handsome.
We took him home and did all the things new parents do, we adored him.
Josh WAS healthy, at 8 weeks he had his first injections, and 19 days later he died.
We'd put him to sleep in our bed after his nightly 3am feed, and by 8:23am he'd fell asleep never to
wake.
He died of cot death.....
Why did my beautiful baby boy have to died for no reason, at least a reason may make this journey of
grief a little easier......
I also had a miss carriage 3mths after Joshy died, we named that baby Jordan Jo..
Joshy does now have an younger sister Jessica who is now 13yrs and a Younger Brother Mark age 12.
They both know about him, and although they never met him, they wished they could
have...............
Thankyou for reading a little of Joshys story.
This is the words to One of Joshys songs " SHATTERED DREAMS"
CHORUS
Shattered Dreams,
Broken Hearts,
Wiery souls, with forgotten plans,
Time will pass you by,
And you'll know you'll cry,
SHATTERED DREAMS.....
Going on together,
Thinking its alright,
Making plans forever,
Trying to live you life,
Feeling so happy,
Things are going fine,
Then all of a sudden,
there will be a cry of Shattered Dreams.
Shattered dreams,
Broken hearts,
Wiery souls, with forgotten plans,
Time will pass you by,
And you know you'll cry,
Shattered Dreams.....
Planning for the future,
A baby comes along,
He gives yopu so much pleasure,
Then it all goes wrong,
Memories that haunt you,
Love thats gone away,
The past is still beside you,
and all your holding onto,
is shattered Dreams....
Shattered dreams,
Broken hearts,
Wiery souls, with forgotten plans,
Time will pass you by,
and you know you'll cry,
Shattered dreams.....
WRITTEN AND SUNG BY MR S A COLLIER
(Joshuas Daddy)
My special boy
Joshua,
I dont know why you left us, and I know your i a better place, but that doesnt stop me missing you, and thinking of you whenever i can.
Its so hard to live without you, as you were wanted for so so long, but I know one day I'll see you again, never to be parted....
Hey guess what son, we seen some friend now that saw you ever week, Its strainge and sometimes hard, Knowing that they knew you, I so just want to spill my heart out to them, and talk about you all the time, but I know that wouldnt be fair. Not just yet, I want to ask them what they remember of you and of the furneral as mummy was so so out of it.
Josh I wished I couold write poetry for you or songs like daddy does, Maybe I should put the words to all 4 of your songs on here. I love you son and miss you daily. sometimes I think we're coping ok and then something hits me and bump back down to earth again.
I cant wait for the day that I see you again, In heavens glory. where we'll never be parted again.
I love and miss you so so much Josh, why oh why did you have to go.....Mummy
Signs are fore those who struggle with their belief
But I know you believe in me and it softens your grief
I do not need to send a sign to show that I am close
Trust the feeling in your heart, it's a stronger sign than most.
Where Did It All Go?
Where did our future go?
Our happy family unit and life?
What happened to all our plans
Where did that first smile go,
First giggle, point and wave
That first 'Dada', first 'Mama'
That first fabulous tooth ?
First look at the sea, first Christmas
First sleep through the night
First steps, first haircut
First Birthday?
The first "I love you"?
What happened to that first day of school
Those scraped knees I was going to kiss better
That first school photo
What happened to that first best friend
That first tooth fairy visit, first gappy grin?
Who stole the insolent teenager who would
Exasperate us, wear us out and make us proud
Where did his wedding day go
And his loving wife
And their beautiful children, our grandchildren ?
In a missed heartbeat
We were robbed of all of this and more,
Of our beloved son and his wondrous treasured life.
Shopping Trip
As I peruse the aisles of the local store
I see things more differently than I ever have before
'Daddy's Little Angel' the embroidered bibs do read
But Daddy's angel is in Heaven and bibs he does not need.
He does not need a bottle, an outfit or a toy
Of buying those things for him we shall never know the joy
There are tiny jars of baby food that he will never eat
And shiny shoes with buckles that will never touch his feet
As the bikes and trikes taunt me from high up on the rack
Tears will break free from my eyes if I dare look back
I run off to the toilets to blow my nose and cry
I wipe my eyes, swallow hard and let out a sigh
I must go face the paper, pencils and wide rule
That my little angel will never use in school
I hurry past the greeting cards that the people choose with care
And I am reminded of the holidays we shall not share
In the checkout line I bow my head and heavy is my heart
For the family right in front of me has a newborn in their cart
Shopping in the local store used to be mundane
Now every aisle's full of items which remind me of my pain
So, quick as I can, I give the cashier the money from my purse
And hurry away from this previously known now foreign universe
I look like a normal shopper and others can never tell
Why what used to be so normal has become a personal hell.
On your 15th Angelversary
Josh
You were with us for such a short time but the impact you had on others was huge. We promise to look after your Mummy and Daddy and your sister and brother and give them all the love we can.
God Bless you little man
John, Joyce, Ian, Nath, and Caroline and Tony xxxx
Your 15th Angel day
Hi sweetheart,
well another year without you. It doesnt get any easier you know. Year after year without you we miss you all the more. I know one day we should see you again sweetheart, and I know for now your in the best place anyone could be in. BUT that doesnt stop me loving you and missing you so so bad. I know daddy does too. I just wanted you to know with the help of a couple of very good friends this year we got through okish, and even been up to your resting place.
Always Josh I love you and Miss you forever. Yes it hurts so bad that your not with us, and I wnt you back here with me where you really belong. BUT ONE DAY, ONE DAY I WILL SEE YOU AGAIN. Love you son ALWAYS Mummy x x x x x x
Special Angel Day - by Sam & Gordon Winson
We do not need a special day
To bring you to our minds.
The days we do not think of you
Are very hard to find.
Each morning when we awake
We know that you are gone.
And no one knows the heartache
As we try to carry on.
Our hearts still ache with sadness
And secret tears still flow.
What it meant to lose you
No one will ever know.
Our thoughts are always with you,
Your place no one can fill.
In life we loved you dearly;
In death we love you still.
There will always be a heartache,
And often a silent tear.
But always a precious memory
Of the days when you were here.
If tears would make a staircase,
And heartaches make a lane,
We'd walk the path to heaven
And bring you home again.
We hold you close within our hearts;
And there you will remain,
To walk with us throughout our lives
Until we meet again.
Our family chain is broken now,
And nothing seems the same,
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.
15th Angel Day
Hi Josh
I will be thinking of you more than usual tomorrow, on your Angelversary.
I know it can't be anything but a very sad and difficult day for your earth family, but I hope that the day passes as gently, quickly and peacefully as it can do for them.
Sorry I can't leave the message tomorrow, but I am house-sitting for a month for my Godmother (as usual) and have no access to a computer there, so it will only be as and when I pop back to my place. On weekends, even if I am home, then James is on the internet instead of me!
I will pray for your lovely Mum Michelle (my special friend), your Dad Steve, your brother and sister and all the rest of your family and loved-ones still here. I am sure that you will be in their thoughts and prayers even more than usual.
Well you're not a baby anymore are you? No you're a big teenager now. Must be hard for everyone to imagine, but regardless of what you would have grown up like, and what characteristics and traits you would have had, I know that your family would have loved you just as much. And that love is still there, and will last forever, so that's the important thing.
I know it must make you feel sad that they are all so sad and that they miss you so much. I know you are safe in Paradise and will be with them there one day, but I know they still ache for you and wonder why you had to go so soon.
Lots of love to them, and of course to you. Thanks to you and your little life, your Mum has helped me through my own grief. And I just know that your life has and will continue to touch so many others lives in a positive way - whether they know it directly or not. Have an even more special day in Heaven than usual young man.
Love Rachel (little Josh's Mummy) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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